Fight for what is right. Fight for our future, and our morals, and our souls. You CAN make the difference.
That moment..
..when you discover the thing that turns ex-boyfriends into assholes. Guilt.
When it is a mutual break-up, there should be no animosity, no anger, no delusions of getting back together. Just saying goodbye. However, when that guy just won’t stop being guilty, it brings out another side COMPLETELY. You could be dating the nicest guy and when you break up it’s like the dick-o-meter just went up full scale.
I don’t think I deserve this. Especially because I wasn’t the one doing the hurting.
All the single ladies!
If he liked it he would have put a ring on it, right? No. He did not.
Post-relationship there is always that flood of phone calls. The “late-night-now-you’re-single-can-we-do-it?” type of phone calls. I may be craving affection but I most certainly do not want my underwear to end up on your messy dorm room floor, or your sweaty palms all over my awesomeness.
I blame it on Facebook. That one status change and the gates are wide open for weird texts/sexts/calls. It’s like, “Oh hey. She is single. Let me virtually grope at her. I am sure her tender emotions won’t mind a little pushy banter whilst I sext her up while she is busy.”
Oh media and social networking, how you have changed. I wish I could go back to one house phone. If I wasn’t home, you weren’t talking to me. If I wasn’t online in AIM or Yahoo!, you weren’t emailing or IM’ing me. BUTTTT NOOOOOOO.
Wow. Long rant.
ANYWHO.
If you want some advice, here it is. Let them flirt. Let them text. Let them call. However, as far as you are concerned the ball is in your court. You are the one who decides to respond or ignore. That drives them nuts too. So, go on with your bad self, and have fun doing it. :]
When you break up with someone it will always hurt. It doesn’t matter how long you have been together or how much you think you felt. You are breaking a bond with someone. The longer you were together..the stronger the bond. There is an invisible rope connecting you, and when you decide to go separate ways.. you rip off part of yourself when they leave.
I do have to say something about my healing process. I take things remarkably well. I am on day 2 and I am able to listen to the radio and NOT cry. Day one, however, was another story. I forced myself to eat when I did not want to. Every song got to me. I even wept in front of friends. In fact, had it not been for the support system that I have, I might have sat in one place for hours weeping.
Where crying a wonderful release, it does nothing for your eyes. So today, I am treating my eyes politely and writing about my joy.
I had a year of wonderful stories, new experiences, and friends. So much good has happened, and I thank him for being a part of that. I will never regret. I will always look to my memories for guidance in the future, and remember what got me there. I am thankful… for break-ups, make-ups, new relationships, old relationships, friends, and just being around to experience it all.
Today is awesome.
Star Warsphabet by Fabian Gonzalez
I took this picture on a photo shoot with a girl I thought hated me in high school. I love that moment when you suddenly realize what a bastard you were in high school. Like, “Oh. Wow. I was afraid of you all that time because your hair was longer than mine? WTF? Am I psychotic?!?” Yes, I am. I am female. Therefore I have these stupid inclinations of “She’s better.”, and , “I’m fat, therefore I must be not appealing to anyone.”. WRONG. I am awesome! I needed some positivity. There it was.
tumblrbot asked: WHERE WOULD YOU MOST LIKE TO VISIT ON YOUR PLANET?
Queenstown, New Zealand.
I am taking a few days to soul search before I get tied into another job. (That means no one has hired me yet and I am trying to be positive about it. ) The first thing I know about soul searching is that I am terrible at it. I get distracted by a YouTube video or a blog about Hungover Owls. (Which I cannot stop reading. I am literally dying of laughter. Help.)
I always thought that when you “took some time”, you were really thinking about life and trying to understand the great mysteries and intricacies of who we are. Nah. I sit around playing video games and fill out online resumes and applications, nursing the wound that is my existence. I keep feeling that I have no purpose, no reason for being, no way out. I am a My Chemical Romance song. Literally. Minus the cancer.
My friends help me out. By help I mean get coffee with me and tell me how silly I am for quitting. It was the principal of it. I was MISERABLE. You cannot work in an environment where you wake up and go.. “Hell. I work in hell. Please, Satan, skewer me with your pitchfork.” (Stop laughing.)
So tell me. Why do you work where you work?
The Stigma of Unemployment
On Monday morning I woke up and I stared at the wall. A wall can hold wonderful stories. That time I fell into it when I was trying to do yoga. That time when I tried to dance. I mean, even Facebook thinks walls are important. The point is, that when I stared at that wall all I could see was my cubicle. The one I wake up, go sit in, and dwell on the fact that I am working INSURANCE. The one I just left behind with a crap ton of candy still in the desk. Hello?!!? I am not an insurance girl! How did I end up there?
Money. I really hate to admit that at a point in my life I let the appeal of money lead me to a job where I wanted to yell at people constantly. It really is not the way I pictured my life going down. I was working in retail and getting crap pay, and somewhere in my stupid, stupid head I let money get the better of me. I decided to take that job and here I am. I have job hunting websites up in 7 tabs. How am I going to change this?
I am going to take deep breaths, shower up, and work on being someone’s special new employee. However, in my process to self discovery I find that people tend to treat you differently. 75% of these people think I walked out without a plan for the future months. UM, NO. NOT THE CASE. I have enough money saved up to take care of myself for 5 months, and that is IF I cannot get a job ASAP. People assume that they know the reason you left. I left due to the fear that this restlessness and self-loathing would not turn into full blown depression. I watched my mother rot in bed for months, therefore I will never put that on anyone else.
People will treat you differently. You will be treated as lazy, incompetent and useless. You are not those things. No matter how many negative things people may spout and sputter, you are wonderful. Hold your head high and job hunt with pride. But please, ladies in particular, find a job you can take pride and be happy with. Gentlemen, shave your beards, people will not hire that. They think small animals live in it.
For people who already have that soul-sucking job of doom. Please, reconsider if a 401K is worth the time lost with your children, that dinner with your mom, that loss of who you are. I would rather be poor and happy, then rich and miserable.
Believe in yourself and other people will too.
-Love, KatiePants.Theunemployedgirlwritingblogs
